9 DPO: Hating the Waiting Game

I despise the two week wait. Patience has never been my strong point, and I have quickly learned I need a lot of it during this journey. I am literally not good at having to wait, which was proven this morning when I decided to go ahead and test this cycle. Uhm, hello, I'm only 9 DPO... like it would have actually been positive anyway! Sometimes I think I must just like torturing myself. And now that I've started testing, I'll probably continue every day. At least my progesterone was good this cycle at 16.5. That's the best it's been so far!

I feel like I have been really irritable this cycle, especially when people (read: my friends who know what we are going through) seem to always bring up other people's pregnancies. I mean, seriously? Do they really think I actually want to hear about other people who are pregnant? Use some common sense, people: I don't. This has happened twice in the past three days! The first instance was on Valentine's Day. I went to dinner and a movie with my best friend because J was out of town on business. She starts talking about a girl she works with who she finds so weird and is pregnant. Gee, thanks for letting me know. I just love to hear about random people I don't even care about who are pregnant.

Then, last night, we hung out with some friends for dinner and game night. One of my friends informs me that their neighbor who has been pregnant lost the baby. She was pretty far along - like far enough that they knew it was a boy. I do feel really, really bad for this couple. In the back of my head, though, I remember the last time my friend told me about their pregnancy was right after she went to their gender reveal party and the mom started bawling when it was revealed it was a boy and basically threw a temper tantrum because she wanted a girl. Let's just say that story made me develop a deep dislike for this girl. Like I said, I still feel awful for her and her husband, but it doesn't mean I like hearing about these kind of things.

So, for now, I am hoping this cycle is the last cycle I am irritated hearing about others' pregnancies... because maybe there won't be another cycle for me.