Long Awaited Peace

Yeah, I realize I've been MIA for awhile. I don't even know when/what I updated last! I'd love to say that things were going well in the baby making department, but I don't have any good news, unfortunately.

I think we did our 2nd IUI in October or November? How bad is it that I don't even remember? Ha! After that one failed, we decided we would take a break for awhile to save for IVF this summer. Needless to say, we haven't done a whole lot of saving. My heart just isn't it. It's like I can't wrap my mind around the fact that IVF might really be the only way we can have a biological child. I keep thinking that we will just get pregnant on our own, though I know at this point the odds are against us.

For the past several weeks all of the options that are available to us have been swimming around my mind constantly... additional IUIs, IVF, adoption, fostering... or just nothing. Don't do anything and hope and pray for the best. I've prayed so long and so hard that God would bring us peace and that we would just feel like one of those decisions was the right one for us. I'm totally type A and the biggest planner you will ever meet, so not having a plan at all has been kind of rough on me.

Today, though, I finally felt that peace that I've been praying so hard for. Out of nowhere, I felt like doing at least one more IUI was the right choice for us at this time. Whereas only yesterday everything IF related was so foggy, today it's crystal clear.

I don't know if it will work. I can only pray that it will. And if it doesn't, at least I will know that we tried, ya know? I am going to call tomorrow to make an appointment to talk things over with my RE at the end of March. I want some time to get healthier and lose some weight before we jump back into things. I'm interesting in hearing my RE's perspective on things, for sure. Here we go again!